I am reprinting this article from November 2013 as it is, once again, National Family Caregivers Month:
This post includes information from the Caregiver Action Network* site, to which all those who benefit from the support of caregivers are indebted. This important information is included on their website:
- There are as many as 90 million family caregivers in the U.S. today.
- Two out of every 5 adults are family caregivers: 39% of all adult Americans are caring for a loved one who is sick or disabled – up from 30% in 2010.
- And it’s not just women doing the caregiving: Men are now almost as likely to say they are family caregivers as women are (37% of men; 40% of women). And 36% of younger Americans between ages 18 and 29 are family caregivers as well.
- Family caregiving is serious work: Almost half of family caregivers perform complex medical/nursing tasks for their loved ones – such as managing multiple medications, providing wound care, and operating specialized medical equipment.
- Family caregivers are the backbone of the Nation’s long-term care system: Family caregivers provide $450 billion worth of unpaid care each year. That’s more than total Medicaid funding, and twice as much as homecare and nursing home services combined.
We in the Parkinson's world refer to caregivers as care partners in order to emphasize the joint involvement of patient and care partner. We recognize that care partners come in a variety of "shapes and sizes", including women, men, family members, or friends We also need to pay tribute to the important roles played by paid homecare, assisted living, or nursing home staff, many of whom are driven primarily by their desire to care for others.
I have written recommendations for PWPs and care partners in previous blog posts that include thoughts priorities for each group as well as how they can support each other. Mutual support, communication, patience, teamwork, and love are hallmarks of a desirable PWP/care partner relationship. I would emphasize the desirable part of that statement while recognizing that we are all human and that there are forces at work that can make this difficult on any given day. The important thing, I think, is that when we "stray off course" to recognize the importance to both parties of returning to that mindset as soon as possible. If we have times when that is difficult, it is important to be willing to reach out to resources like support groups, "umbrella" organizations (like Parkinson Association of the Rockies in our area), clergy, family, or friends. We are not in this alone!
In my case, I am extraordinarily fortunate to have the best caregiver I could ever hope for, my wife of 44 years, Linda. As a former social worker, it is her nature to care for others and put their needs ahead of her own. While we have our ups and downs (see the previous paragraph) like anyone else, we are blessed by mutual love, devotion, support of family and friends, and shared faith that serves as our "true north". Importantly, we are also both involved in and committed to supporting our local support group in Highlands Ranch, Bionic Brigade (the Denver area DBS support group), Parkinson Association of the Rockies (PAR), a new care partner support group, and the Parkinson Disease Foundation (PDF) patient research advocacy program, as well as remaining involved in community support programs through our church.
One of the ways Linda displays her patience is by allowing me to spend hours at my computer working on my writing, which currently includes this blog and finishing a new book titled Window of Opportunity: Living with the reality of Parkinson's and the threat of dementia**. She did the same as I wrote my PD-related children's books***in 2011 and earlier this year (the new one focuses on the role of care partners as well as other PD issues). We travelled together to the recent World Parkinson Congress in Montreal.
She demonstrates her commitment to my well-being by encouraging me to join her for walks, bike rides, or to work out at our local recreation center. She is my golf partner, camping buddy, and travel companion (we have a trip to Shanghai planned to visit our son and family next March). Since I only drive very short distances infrequently, she is also my chauffeur.
I would invite all my PWP friends to go out of their way in November (and in the months that follow) to find ways both subtle and overt to express our love and appreciation to those who are devoting their lives to us, often at the expense of their own interests. Finally, we need to recognize that PWPs have a caregiver role to play by ensuring that our partner's wellness is not overlooked. After all, where would we be without them?
In my case, I am extraordinarily fortunate to have the best caregiver I could ever hope for, my wife of 44 years, Linda. As a former social worker, it is her nature to care for others and put their needs ahead of her own. While we have our ups and downs (see the previous paragraph) like anyone else, we are blessed by mutual love, devotion, support of family and friends, and shared faith that serves as our "true north". Importantly, we are also both involved in and committed to supporting our local support group in Highlands Ranch, Bionic Brigade (the Denver area DBS support group), Parkinson Association of the Rockies (PAR), a new care partner support group, and the Parkinson Disease Foundation (PDF) patient research advocacy program, as well as remaining involved in community support programs through our church.
One of the ways Linda displays her patience is by allowing me to spend hours at my computer working on my writing, which currently includes this blog and finishing a new book titled Window of Opportunity: Living with the reality of Parkinson's and the threat of dementia**. She did the same as I wrote my PD-related children's books***in 2011 and earlier this year (the new one focuses on the role of care partners as well as other PD issues). We travelled together to the recent World Parkinson Congress in Montreal.
She demonstrates her commitment to my well-being by encouraging me to join her for walks, bike rides, or to work out at our local recreation center. She is my golf partner, camping buddy, and travel companion (we have a trip to Shanghai planned to visit our son and family next March). Since I only drive very short distances infrequently, she is also my chauffeur.
I would invite all my PWP friends to go out of their way in November (and in the months that follow) to find ways both subtle and overt to express our love and appreciation to those who are devoting their lives to us, often at the expense of their own interests. Finally, we need to recognize that PWPs have a caregiver role to play by ensuring that our partner's wellness is not overlooked. After all, where would we be without them?
* The Caregiver Action Network is the nation’s leading family caregiver organization working to improve the quality of life for the more than 65 million Americans who care for loved ones with chronic conditions, disabilities, disease, or the frailties of old age. CAN serves a broad spectrum of family caregivers ranging from the parents of children with special needs, to the families and friends of wounded soldiers; from a young couple dealing with a diagnosis of MS, to adult children caring for parents with Alzheimer’s disease. CAN (formerly the National Family Caregivers Association) is a non-profit organization providing education, peer support, and resources to family caregivers across the country free of charge.
**Not yet released
***Kirk's children's books are books one and two in his "Shaky Paws Grampa" series titled Carson And His Shaky Paws Grampa (http://www.innovopublishing.com/innovo-store/digital-titles/product/190-carson-and-his-shaky-paws-grampa-by-kirk-hall-paperback-edition.html) and Carina And Her Care Partner Gramma(http://www.innovopublishing.com/innovo-store/digital-titles/product/343-carina-and-her-care-partner-gramma-by-kirk-hall-hardback.html).
**Not yet released
***Kirk's children's books are books one and two in his "Shaky Paws Grampa" series titled Carson And His Shaky Paws Grampa (http://www.innovopublishing.com/innovo-store/digital-titles/product/190-carson-and-his-shaky-paws-grampa-by-kirk-hall-paperback-edition.html) and Carina And Her Care Partner Gramma(http://www.innovopublishing.com/innovo-store/digital-titles/product/343-carina-and-her-care-partner-gramma-by-kirk-hall-hardback.html).
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