Legacy

                                                                 5-18-2021

It is 4:30 in the morning.  I do a lot of my “deeper” thinking during the night.  It seems like I have better “clarity” at that time.  Possibly because there is less mental traffic to clog my circuitry.  Another possibility is that my judgement is not great at that time, which leads to ideas that “lose their luster” in the light of day,

In any case, I have been thinking about the above topic since writing the piece yesterday morning about Robin Williams.  I think most of us, or at least some of us, think about what our legacy will be from time to time.  That may lead to thinking further about what we would like it to be.  I spent a lot of time in my business career doing strategic planning.  One of the most important parts of this process was deciding “where you were trying to go” as an organization.  Later in my career I had a business that helped people with career planning which often started with the individual answering the question “what do I want to be when I grow up”.  In other words, developing an individual strategic plan.

That is all any of us can really do when it comes to our legacy.  Imagine someone describing our legacy at some point in the future and what we would like to hear them say.  Then we at least have the opportunity to do things that might lead to those comments after we are gone.  Because legacies can’t really be built.  They are described in hindsight.

When I look back at my career “pre-PD”, it seems to me that much of what I did in my business career was preparing me for what I have been trying to do as a PD advocate (my current job description).  If I had died at 59 instead of being diagnosed with PD, I can’t imagine my legacy being very memorable when it comes to my career.  Actually, I think my legacy would have been the wonderful boys that Linda and I raised.  I still believe that will be our most important legacy.

So where am I going with this?  I better get back to that or I will lose the thoughts that got me out of bed.  Regarding my “advocacy career”, I feel that I am doing work that is personally meaningful for the first time in my life.  That is a real gift!  I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about what I am going to do.  One thing leads to the next thing and so on.  It has been that way since I was diagnosed.  It has become more challenging to maintain my “forward momentum” the last couple years.  But each time I have “slowed down”, it seems that I eventually have been motivated to “re-enter the fray”.  I don’t really know if anything I have done or will do has any lasting value.  That is not and can’t be my motivation.  That will be for whoever is in charge of describing my legacy to decide.  I am just grateful to have had the opportunity to finally do something that seems important.